Our world is not a bland one. Everywhere you go, there are exciting sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures. When you describe these sensory details to readers, you create a world that your readers can become immersed in. Look at the differences between these two passages. The first is rather dull, despite the exciting event that is about to happen.
Passage 1
The storm was moving in fast, with strong winds and heavy rain. I ran toward the garden shed and got inside, hoping to escape the rain. The shed was dirty inside and full of old tools. It was so short I bumped my head on the ceiling. I grabbed an old shovel and tried to use it to hold the door shut against the wind.
Passage 2
The storm was squalling in, its winds howling ahead of a dense curtain of rain. I ran toward the slouching garden shed and squeezed inside. In the half-light, my head bumping against the low ceiling, I ran my hands along the filthy walls of the shed, hoping to find a tool I could use to hold the door shut. Grabbing a bent shovel, I felt a splinter drive deep into my hand from the fraying handle. As the the rain pelted the shed's metal roof, I wedged the sharp tip of the shovel against the door, and managed to shut out most of the downpour.
What sensory details appear in Passage 2, and which senses do they address?
| Detail | Sense |
| howling | sound |
| dense curtain of rain | sight |
| slouching garden shed | sight |
| half-light | sight |
| filthy walls | touch |
| sharp splinter | touch |
| pelted the metal roof | sound |
